59 (Savage &) Funny Roasts To Tell Your Friends

  • February 14, 2024

Last Updated on February 14, 2024 by Ketan

Friends who never take your insult seriously, but roast you even harder, are your ‘Best Friends’ only.

So, your roast has to be funny or savage which leaves no chance for them.

Even, your delivery timing should be perfect, too.

During a friendly argument or to tease your bestie anytime, you often say mean jokes or one-liners. 

Well, if you need some funny roasts to tell your friends from school or college, then this article will do.

Either to ridicule them or to win arguments, we have the list of best roasts to try on your bestie.


Good Roasts To Say To Your Friends

With your friends together you target someone else and make fun of them.

But with a best friend, you both have fun while roasting each other when you’re just bored. 

If your best friend always gets you with his insults, you can have your comeback roasts from here.

Good Roasts To Say To Your Friends

1. “Well, you have the smartest person, that’s ‘Me’. And, I have the dumbest, that’s ‘You’.”

2. “I can never be mad at you. Because you’re crazy and people call me stupid if I argue with you.”

3. “If I get the chance to make you my friend again, I will ignore you. Because I don’t make a mistake twice.”

4. “Some people have great friends. Alas, I have ‘You’.”

5. “If you ever see how you look when you talk, you will never say a word.” 

6. “You know I’m done insulting you, you don’t deserve my roast.” 

7. “I have to say you’re the best, at every wrong thing.”

8. “I agree, that we become more like people we usually hang out with. Most people say, I’m stupid now.” 

9. “If I ever compare you with the stupidest person, he feels roasted.” 

10. “You know when you’re with us, you make us smile. And laugh, when you leave.”  

11. “Well, I wish to have superpower to go into space, I will bring you along and drop you somewhere there.” 

12. “I admit that I have the worst taste, that I chose you as my friend.” 

13. “So grateful to have you as my friend, you taught me things I never have to do.” 

14. “There’s no way anyone has any close friends like I get. You are so unique, different and superbly weird.” 


Funny Roasts To Tell Your Friends

Even being surrounded by friends, you all feel bored together. 

You need humor, a bit of sarcasm, and just fun. 

In between, one friend tells you to share a joke. So you can start with these funny roasts.   

Funny Roasts To Friends

1. “You should be grateful to have me. Because I’m your only friend.”

2. “Every time you open your mouth, the magic happens and people disappear.” 

3. “I’m so embarrassed by you, that I can’t take you even to my colony.” 

4. “Every air that goes into you dies. And the one who gets out of you kills others.” 

5. “I just chose to hang out with you because you’re ugly than me. And, this way I look better.”

6. “I wish I could beat you. But you’ve no one to take care of you. That’s still me.”

7. “No matter how many times you roll your eyes, you won’t find anything in your head.” 

8. “I’m not sure… whether you’re too dumb to understand that or I’m just too good at Ignoring you.”

9. “I hope for the day when say something good and I win the lottery. But, that’s never going to happen.” 

10. “Everything is changing, but not you, my friend. You’re the same, like always.”

11. “I have a bunch of short guys as friends, just to look taller.” 

12. “Can you give me a break for the next fifty years? I want to know what life would be like without you.”

13. “Thanks for letting me know what is like to have a fake friend.” 

14. “I look up to you only to get to know what I shouldn’t do actually.”

15. “That’s the best you can do. And, I don’t have any expectations from you, so chill.”


Clean Roasts For Your Friends

While arguing with your friend, you need backup roasts on your defense. 

So, here are some of the behavioral or personality-related roasts that are so clean it may shut your friend up. 

Clean Roasts For Your Friends

1. “Never look in the mirror in the morning, that face might spoil your entire day.” 

2. “You’re right, I’m no match for you, in terms of stupidity and foolishness.” 

3. “I can’t blame you, I know your entire family works at the drama.” 

4.” I never have any regrets in my life, except letting you in my life.”

5. “Why can’t you just stop sometimes, no one is listening to you.” 

6. “Could you just stop embarrassing us, too? PLEASE. Already four people came to me and asked do I know you?” 

7. “I’ve saved your pictures on my phone to scare against any potential viruses.” 

8. “God knows he doesn’t need you, hoped the world might. But, we don’t either.”

9. “Anytime when someone says you’re so handsome. Check if it’s 1st April.”

10. “You’re the reason I can’t trust anyone, what a fake friend you are.”  

11. “Do you ever wonder why I agree with you on anything? Because I don’t want to see you cry.” 

12. “Bro, you’re so miserable that your shadow even looks ugly.”

13. “I thought I’m not good enough, But, after seeing you’re even worse than me, I feel better.”

14. “You know most people secretly tell me that I’m in a bad company. You can guess why they say so.”


Savage Roasts For Your Best Friend

With your best friend, you can’t wait for the right time to share a roast. 

Anytime is perfect.

While sitting next to or over text, when you both are looking for some fun, try being sarcastic and savage.

So, these are good roasts to roast your bestie and only they can handle it right. 

Savage Roasts For Your Best Friend

1. “Genius people’s brains are stored somewhere. But yours not even in your body.”

2. “Now I realize why your dad left you and your mom.” 

3. “Bro, you’re awesome. I mean very awful.”

4. “You must have been born when your parents were just kidding.”

5. “You have such a nice parent. I just wonder, how they end up having a child like yourself.” 

6. “Your home is the most silent place when you are out.” 

7. “Can you please give me such a break from your friendship?”

8. “If you still don’t know, let me tell you no one here wants to talk to you.”

9. “Your good morning wishes will work only when you don’t show up.”

10. “I’m jealous of your stupidity, I wish I could ever be like yours.” 

11. “Seeing you have such a weird personality, gives me the motivation to stay normal.” 

12. “Bye, text me when you’re home. So I know, I’m safe from your BS.” 

13. “Anytime when I need guidance, I take your advice and do the opposite.”

14. “Dude, are you for real? Because I don’t think there’s anyone who can think like you do.” 

15. “Being with you I realize that the more you talk the more stupid you look.”  

16. “I admit that I’m a loser because I hang out with you and I learn only from you.” 



Well, good roasts are not just to shut the bestie down or win over the arguments.

Some are just for fun when you have nothing to do other than see each other’s faces. 

Anytime you and your friends are together, bored with watching the same shows, and want live action, start a roast battle.

That would be more fun and entertaining though.

No matter what kinds of roasts you want to say to your friends, be sure they won’t take it personally. 

And of course, you better be ready for their comebacks, for sure. 


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